literature

100 Things Japan Cannot Do

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Literature Text

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.

There are mentions of possible yaoi pairings in here (America/Japan; Prussia/Canada, Korea/Hong Kong, Germany/Italy), so if you don't like it, don't read.

100 Things Japan Can Not Do

1) I should not agree with everything America says during meetings.

2) It annoys the other nations.

3) Including Switzerland.

4) And he has guns.

5) Big ones.

6) I am not allowed to draw doujinshi of the other nations.

7) Even if they are requested.

8) Especially by France.

9) Or Hungary.

10) I should not tell China that Hello Kitty is cuter than Shinatty-chan.

11) Even if it's true.

12) I am not allowed to talk to Hungary unsupervised.

13) This includes phone calls.

14) And texting.

15) I should not bring up the Russo-Japanese War around Russia.

16) Especially if he has his pipe.

17) Or if Belarus is nearby.

18) She's even more frightening than Russia.

19) Having "private meetings" with America in the closet in unacceptable.

20) Putting a camera in above mentioned closet is also unacceptable.

21) And illegal.

22) No matter how good the footage is.

23) Then again, what they don't know can't hurt them.

24) Taking photos and video of other nations without their permission is an invasion of privacy.

25) I am not allowed to post the non-existent video and photos on Hungary's website.

26) I am not allowed on Hungarys' website.

27) I am not allowed to injure anyone who mentions "that night" with Greece.

28) Especially if they mention it in front of America.

29) He gets jealous easily.

30) Not that it ever happened.

31) Seriously.

32) It is not a good idea to let it slip that Canada has never has his vital regions invaded.

33) Canada would not be happy.

34) Prussia,however, would be.

35) At least until he finds out other nations are interested as well.

36) I am not allowed to draw anime characters on important documents.

37) Or cute animals

38) Hitting Korea is not the best way to get him to stop groping me.

39) Getting America to do it is much more effective.

40) So is directing his attention to someone else.

41) Like Hong Kong.

42) Better him than me.

43) This also applies to Italy.

44) Only use Germany instead.

45) Meetings are not an appropriate place to cosplay.

46) Especially as a female character.

47) According to France, it just makes me more "rapeable".

48) I should avoid France.

49) And Russia.

50) Possibly Taiwan as well.

51) America is okay, though.

52) Is "rapeable" even a word?

53) I should not mention WWII at any time.

54) It brings back bad memories.

55) And makes it very awkward for Germany.

56) Pulling on the Italy brothers hair curls is very inappropriate.

57) As is tugging on other nations curls to see if they are similar.

58) For science, of course.

59) I am not allowed to tell Sealand, Latvia, or Lichtenstein what yaoi, yuri, hentai, etc. is.

60) I am not allowed to use photos, videos, or drawings as examples either.

61) I am not allowed to help Hungary kidnap Canada and leave him tied up in Prussia's room.

62) Although, it would be a waste to let those cameras go unused.

63) And Canada does look really cute in a french maid outfit.

64) Bringing Poochi-kun to meetings is a bad idea.

65) Greece's cats agree.

66) Bringing my katana is also a bad idea.

67) America would try to play with it.

68) He'd end up hurting someone.

69) Like himself.

70) And then Germany will be mad about the blood stains.

71) It is pointless to argue with Estonia over whose better with technology.

72) Everyone knows it's me.

73) Reading manga during meetings is rude.

74) Even if they are rather boring.

75) No offense to Germany, of course.

76) I should not pass out manga during meetings either.

77) Especially if it's 2D porn.

78) I should not make cute little characters based on England's eyebrows.

79) He will not find it funny.

80) Though I'm sure America would.

81) Probably Sealand, too.

82) Watching horror movies with America is a bad idea.

83) They give him nightmares.

84) So he insists on sharing your bed.

85) … ignore 82-84.

86) Same goes for video games.

87) Dressing Italy up so I can take pictures is not allowed.

88) Germany says so.

89) He'll change his mind when he sees the leather.

90) I should not eat England's food.

91) Or America's.

92) Especially if it's blue.

93) Or neon green.

94) I should not try to break up Turkey and Greece when they are fighting.

95) They make me take sides with which one of them I like best.

96) No comment.

97) Chopsticks are not to be used as weapons.

98) Even if Italy tries to steal from my plate.

99) Flirting with Greece or Turkey to make America jealous is mean.

100) It's also more fun than should be legal.


Yeah, I got a bit lazy at the end, but I was running out of ideas.
This is just one of those "100 things _____ Cannot Do" meme things you see all over the place. I thought it would be fun to try it for Japan aka Kiku from Hetalia.

:iconchibijapanplz:

Be warned: There are some hints of yaoi pairings. Namely: America/Japan, Prussia/Canada, Korea/Hong Kong, and Germay/Italy.
© 2010 - 2024 shinigamikarasu
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I love how half the rules involve illegal porn/doujinshi XD oh, i love the HETALIA fandom